fake-ation

it’s holiday vacation time, and the “civilized” among us are stuffing ourselves into beaches, bars, and second homes around the globe. we slave away for months for a few weeks of collected bliss on the beach, with close friends or lovers, or getting “back to nature”. but with the best intentions, vacations are becoming a way for us to be stuck with millions of others trying to get away from each other.

first, the planning. tickets, transfers, rooms, rates, and other prerequisites all insist we take as much fun out of our bliss as possible. we can go to an agent, but bad agents abound and bad travel makes infamous holiday memories that last a lifetime. next, the travel. everyone agrees that planes and trains are just a joy during holiday season, right? of course we do. just remember to upgrade to first class to get away from the farting children and screaming babies visiting grandma for the first time.

when you finally arrive at your anticipated destination, their are thousands of people doing the same. the rat race you’ve desperately longed to escape from has been outsourced to wherever you go. you’ll never think about how oil has made this unnatural and otherwise unsustainable human population possible, but you’ll fool yourself into thinking it would have been simpler, cheaper, and/or more enjoyable if you had driven a car to get here.

the bills for all of this will come next month, and when they do you’ll pour another drink to emotionally medicate yourself sufficiently until you can get away from it all next holiday vacation.